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MetroJacksonville rates and reviews nightclubs based on professional and subjective categories that will be figured using a mathematical formula.
The Club Rating Formula:
There are six categories that our obstreperous reviewers rate:
Quote
S = Service
This is pretty self explanatory: Is it sufficiently staffed with trained well disposed people? Is service prompt and professional? Are the employees competent and attentive?
D = Drinks
This is a pretty subjective category. In liquor bars, it's a measure of the quality of liquors available, as well as whether the bartenders actually know what they are doing. We give extra points for showmanship during mixing, as well as how well constructed the drink is. Beer and Wine Bars get an automatic rating of 3, but we give extra points for great selections.
CZ = Crowd Size
This has everything to do with people per square feet, not total number of people. If a small club is crowded with 50 people in it, they will get a 5. If a huge club looks deserted with 300 people in it, they will get a 1. Clubbing is about socializing. If people are so spread out that you cant mix, then its sort of self defeating isn't it?
CF = Crowd Friendliness
Is the crowd itself friendly? Can a person meet and/or get introduced to others reasonably easily? Is it cliquish and not open to outsiders? Is it clear that a bar fight is possible from the minute one walks into the room? Should one mind one's P's and Q's?
FMS= Friendliness To Metro Jacksonville Staff
Lets face it, if their staff isn't going to be friendly to an honest to god reviewer, who are they going to be friendly to?
B = Bonus Points
Totally random. Anything that sticks out of the ordinary, whether positive or negative.
This is pretty self explanatory: Is it sufficiently staffed with trained well disposed people? Is service prompt and professional? Are the employees competent and attentive?
D = Drinks
This is a pretty subjective category. In liquor bars, it's a measure of the quality of liquors available, as well as whether the bartenders actually know what they are doing. We give extra points for showmanship during mixing, as well as how well constructed the drink is. Beer and Wine Bars get an automatic rating of 3, but we give extra points for great selections.
CZ = Crowd Size
This has everything to do with people per square feet, not total number of people. If a small club is crowded with 50 people in it, they will get a 5. If a huge club looks deserted with 300 people in it, they will get a 1. Clubbing is about socializing. If people are so spread out that you cant mix, then its sort of self defeating isn't it?
CF = Crowd Friendliness
Is the crowd itself friendly? Can a person meet and/or get introduced to others reasonably easily? Is it cliquish and not open to outsiders? Is it clear that a bar fight is possible from the minute one walks into the room? Should one mind one's P's and Q's?
FMS= Friendliness To Metro Jacksonville Staff
Lets face it, if their staff isn't going to be friendly to an honest to god reviewer, who are they going to be friendly to?
B = Bonus Points
Totally random. Anything that sticks out of the ordinary, whether positive or negative.
In the first five categories, we give a rating between Zero and Five. Zero being god awful. A rating of Five is excellent.
The sixth category is for Bonus Points, however and can earn a rating of -5 through +5, depending on the reason and importance of the bonus cause.
The entire amount is then divided by 5, which gives you our rating.
Now. it is important to notice that we do not rate based on the kind of music or the clientele that the clubs cater to. Nor do we give a fig's leaf about the size or age of the club, and are not impressed by cheap marketing ploys. We don't rate a club on the basis of the age of the clientele or whether it serves full liquor or beer and wine. The ratings reflect what any person walking into the club for the first time would notice.
And yes. We include the bathrooms. People should not have to consult with the EPA before using them.
A note from the clubs editor, Stephen Dare.
One finds oneself pondering the imponderable question about nightclub reviews. How can one find the perfect evening? Fun, genuine fun has a lot to do with luck, but just as much on selection. Selection of location and time, selection of friends, and of course selection of goals whether they be achievable or no. Lets face it, not everyone is going to be able to attain the goal of romancing royalty, waking up to an incredibly lucrative buy off plan and then having to choose between cash and happiness before the day is out just simply by setting that as a goal before going out to ShantyTown.
It goes without saying that not all environments are created equal---some are just bound to be a lot more conducive to enjoyment than others. This is pretty easily demonstrable. Even a fool knows that a nightclub surrounded by attractive young people copiously consuming substances that cloud decision making skills is going to be a lot more helpful to the pursuit of good clean fun than a prison work yard surrounded by banking executives and recently unparoled, violently obese serial sex offenders (as if the universe were at all capable of producing such a perfect arena of justice)
The same holds true, and just as radically, within the narrower location subcategory of nightclubs. For that aforementioned luck to happen, one of the prerequisites is a great location, a place where people connect
This pub crawl is set in Riverside, and it was extremely interesting to say the least.
More than any other side of town besides Springfield, Riverside is known for its quirky diversity. There are literally all types in the neighborhood: Uptight Republican housewives cheerfully sport McCain Palin stickers on their SUVs as they drop off their aggressively pierced tuba playing offspring after meeting them at the bank for lunch. Gay gogo boys mingle with the dreadlocked culturati in the derivative alehouses while gothic chicks try not to ignore future sorority sisters at the Bagel shops. Baptist ministers looking hale and well met sit next to seriously prim nurses from St. Vincents at the coffeehouses as they listen in on the lesbian chit chat going on behind the counters and play the perennial guessing game of whose gender is authentic with all the passersby.
The perfectly coiffed children of people who have already paid in advance to make sure that said urchins will never have to mingle with anyone resembling a commoner throughout their educational experience can be seen walking through the parks, passing the 'sup' kids whose asses are hanging decoratively out of their low slung pants.
It was into this neighborhood, this township of bony 20 year olds in hardwood floor apartments and lusciously contoured girls in the post girdle generation that our Club Review Team was dispatched.
The team assembled for the job included the lovely Miss Browning, she of Cute Boys with a Hotness fame. Christopher Byron Phillips, giving every appearance of being a semi conservative 30 something male on the prowl, was a perfect complement. He gave it a big brother/little sister kind of a feel. Christopher's long long experience with Club Reviewing back in the late 80s, early 90's also gave the whole endeavor a sybaritic element that the editor has felt lacking for a while. Christopher actually was once upon a time a club reviewer for Dare Tabloid, during which he left quite a swath across the discofantastic dregs of the pre-grungers of the era.
Finishing off the team was the gifted young Jordan Rutter, a UNF student who nonetheless manages to look perhaps five days short of 11 and a half years old. He has a dry and devastating wit about things, and the editor hoped that the jailbaityness of his exterior appearances would at least keep the bastards on their toes.
First stop Avondale.
When the Club Crawl team arrived in the gracious little district on St. John's Avenue, we were struck with the timeless southern charm and beauty of the area. This is a place that knows how to do it right. Everything is within two blocks of brick buildings and graceful pastel facades, and the unmistakable air coming off of the river mingles with the smell of well tended lawns and Spanish Moss. The streets are buzzing with little nodes of activity---we are destined for two of them---and the tasteful cars advertise that this is a well heeled and monied community.
Avondale is not a frilly and sumptuous little bit of southern whimsy in the way that San Marco is. It is not a funky indie district with distinctly Floridian influences the way that Five Points is, and it doesn't evoke old Florida or big city the way that Springfield does. There is something immensely more private and secure feeling, something that evokes more Richmond than Charleston. Perhaps its all the oak trees everywhere. Or the brick.
It gives the visitor a sense of infinite safety. It would be almost impossible to imagine anything terrible happening in Avondale--other than an infrequent hair coloring tragedy. It is truly a little oasis of a neighborhood. It exudes taste, and comfort.
It was into this refined backdrop that we stepped out of our cars.
The Casbah 9:10pm to 9:45 pm
S(4) + CZ(4) + CF(4) + FMS(5) + D(3) + Bonus(0)
5
The Casbah is the ultimate secret retreat/startpoint/end up of the children of Jacksonville's wealthest families. They are a well groomed and flirtatiously hip lot and they descend on the tables like little flocks of graceful birds chattering away, pecking at IPhones and ordering copious amounts of flavored hookahs. On arrival at the front gates of the courtyard, we were greeted by Miriam, the hostess and traditional Middle-Eastern music. There was still a little bit of hubbub from the performance of the Cabaret style Belly Dancers which we missed, unfortunately. We heard quite a bit about them from the laid back chatty patrons, it was mentioned (frequently) that they like the Belly Dancers!
It had been pretermined by the gods that the evening was going to be saturated in Raspberry. No one is quite sure how this happened--perhaps the team seemed to be metaphysically screaming: We need something Tart! but the rasbberry trend began immediately at Casbah. Jennifer Browning ordered a Lambic, which is a beer that tastes like a grown up Raspberry Soda Pop. It's a great beer, one for sipping on rather than gulping, but it was a bit pricey at 7 dollars expecially for such a small glass--ah the practical downsides of drinking with the wealthy..
Christopher Byron Phillips tried the Raspberry Wheat beer with the strange disclaimer, "It's not very good, it doesn't come highly recommended." He mumbled something about it being sweet with a bad aftertaste.
The team perused the specialty drink menu, but decided to leave some of their suggested drink combinations to more adventurous drinkers.
One particularly revolting sounding concoction is called the "Chocolate Covered Raspberry" which is Guiness and Lambic together.... interesting. Personally, it sounds like a bit of a stretch. I would suggest Raspberry Flavored Retching....
As it turned out Jordan Rutter is an old hand at the Casbah and started discussing the hookah's, apparently they're out of tobacco flavors quite frequently. Specifically, (and with tart disatisfaction) he mentioned that the Blue Mist and Plum flavors were out the most.
The bathroom line provided a perfect illustration of the vibe: The lines are persistent and sometimes lingering, after a wait, one guy come out of the women's room apologetically assuring all the waiting women, "I put the seat back down, I swear."
Jordan and Miss Browning ended up at the bar talking to the bartender, Courtney, and some of the regulars of the Casbah.
We gave props to the owner, Sayid, for pointing us in the right direction, and making introductions.
Brad Sweeting and Krystal Stoyanovich were happy to answer our questions. Brad said "I like the easygoing atmosphere and the good prices keep me coming back." Krystal chimed in, "The atmosphere is relaxing and chill."
At an adjoining table Andre Perez exclaimed, "This place is freaking awesome! I love this place!" Curiously, his tablemate Lane informed us that the "Food is better than expected."
The place was just buzzing and there was a wait at the gate. Awesome wonderful place despite the common 'out of tobacco' complaints
Krystal Stoyanovich and Brad Sweeting at The Casbah
Andre Perez at The Casbah
Courtney, the lovely Casbah Bartender
West Inn Cantina 9: 47pm to 10:05 pm
S(4) + CZ(5) + CF(4) + FMS(5) + D(5) + Bonus(-1)
5
West Inn Cantina (half of the locals still call it Monty's) is practically next door, and our motley little crew was greeted by Linda Spofford, one of the owners, a dynamite looking woman who is the epitome of bar etiquette and salty fun. She took us directly to Joanne Robinson, one of the bartenders, so we could get our drinks.
Joanne made us her delicacy, A Redheaded Slut, ---Jagermeister, Peach Schnapps, and Cranberry juice. Highly fruity but so good, even the guys drink them. Pretty good start.
I felt like a ping-pong ball in a tournament because I was bouncing off of people on my way to the bathrooms. The bar was crushingly packed! Such an eccentric mixture of people hanging around.
Christopher started mingling with the crowd and ran into, quite literally, Daniel Van Gundy, a regular. They struck up a conversation during which he strongly recommended the menu. "Pork Taquitos are excellent!"
The menu is actually decent, but we were there for drinking and fun. Thankfully because the place is a food establishment, there is no smoking inside, however, there is a nice patio outside where the smokers can lurk, and which is always packed.
Jordan Rutter, perhaps a little lost in all of the 30-40 year olds chimed in helpfully about the music. "It's total bar rock!"
Crime solved, Jordan. El Camino one of Walter Mingledorf's bands was performing for the drunken approval of the crowd.
A pretty fun time, but it was time to head on:
Next stop Five Points.
El Camino, performing at West Inn Cantina
Joanne Robinson, Owner Linda Spofford and Lisa Hunt
Daniel Van Gundy
Five Points was busy. Packed. There were a couple of different things happening that night and the evening was full of a weird effusive energy.
Standing in the middle of Five Points, there were clusters and crowds of people in three different directions and there was a feeling of real urban life: The bars were hopping and there were lots of little groups strolling in between the establishments of the extremely walkable district. We were scheduled for stops at four of the establishments and the first was the Five Points Coffee and Spice Company.
5 Points Coffee & Spice 10:20 pm to 10: 36 pm
S(3) + CZ(1) + CF(3) + FMS(5) + D(4) + Bonus(2)
5
The team was surprised that the owner, Alvah, a longtime riverside character, was taking a richly deserved day off. We hadnt eaten at Casbah so I ordered the excellent Tomato and Basil Salad. It's one of the best places in town to buy coffee, and they have a specialty coffee that is simply awesome. Try the vietnamese iced coffee. This rich drink is made with condensed cream and served over ice. Its smooth and sweet and will totally wire you for the evening.. Starshmucks can't compete with it.!
One of the regulars---who demanded that we keep his name anonymous to protect him and his family from the who-knows-what's out there--said, "This is a home away from home. The food is like a home cooked meal. This is the one place [Restaurant/Cafe] I can go to in Jacksonville, sit down and have a home cooked meal and actually feel like I'm at home."
Outside "The Magic Man" (Andy Johnson) kept us entertained while Jennifer munched her salad. He did this amazing trick where he took two one dollar bills and turned them into one two dollar bill. We swear! We saw it with our own eyes.... It's magic! He kept our team quite amused for a few minutes before we walked next door to SteamWorks.
Steamworks 10:37pm to 10:53 pm
S(4) + CZ(2) + CF(4) + FMS(5) + D(3) + Bonus(3)
5
Steamworks is a funky little place that's great for hanging out with friends, shooting pool, and grabbing beers. Since it's October, they were screening a Halloween movie which was pretty cool. We really didn't watch too much of it, but there were zombies and such on the screen.
There is a heavy fog of smoke that covers the place, and there are hipsters deluxe crowding the booths and pool tables. In the back there is a dancefloor, Im told that it resembles the set up at the legendary old MotoLounge in downtown.
I found the regulars, Daniela Tirado and Errett Goff, hanging out by the bar drinking beers that Landon Cole (DJ L'NDN) and Devon Wolf had served them. I asked Daniela what she liked the most about Steamworks, and she said it was within walking distance to her apartment. Errett gave his reasons for liking Steamworks, "I've been coming here over a year now. Anything goes , there are beautiful ladies, and a ridiculously awesome beer selection."
Errett described Landon, the bartender, "Landon's like the guy from Cheers, in a tank top and jeans."
Landon served me a Kelly's Irish Cider. Not terribly strong and kind of sweet. There wasn't any music playing while I was there, so everyone started joking that Landon should DJ. That would be amazing to watch... a DJ serving beers between sets.
On our way to Wall Street.
Bartenders Devon Wolf and Landon Cole (DJ L'NDN)
Errett Goff and Daniela Tirado
On the way we ran into a Channel 4 Action News van parked at the corner of Post and Lomax Streets. The reporter told Christopher, "We're covering the story about the girl who was raped in Riverside." Which was definitely a buzzkill as we continued on to Wall Street.
Wall Street 10:57 pm to 11: 35pm
S(4) + CZ(2) + CF(3) + FMS(5) + D(3) + Bonus(0)
5
We walked into Wall Street and immediately got sprinkled with deja vu. The manager, Debbie, pointed us towards Penny, with the exclamation "She's a damn good bartender." Penny handed us Poisonberrys --- Crown, Chambord, a splash of sweet and sour, a splash of seven and cranberry juice.
Miss Browning walked off for mere moments and upon returning could find neither Christopher or her drink.
Jordan Rutter notes: I immediately noticed the atmosphere of the place was different from the other places I've been. It was early in the night and there were only a handful of people in the building, but the small crowd had some variety to it.
One of the patrons confided that it was "where old hipsters go to die" right before "Summer Lovin'" started playing on the jukebox to universal approval. The place was a lot more laid-back than the other bars, although I'm not sure if that's in spite of, or because of, the sense of resignation.
A close look at the photo appears to have captured Nick Osgood
Birdie's 11:00 pm to 11: 35 pm
S(5) + CZ(4) + CF(4) + FMS(5) + D(5) + Bonus(1)
5
Birdie's was jumping with people and local celebrities when we arrived. The team immediately recognized Jared Chase Bowser from the Sunbears! Miss Browning walked over to his table, bold as brass and joined Birdie employee and brilliant musician Christina Wagner who was also at the table.
Jared doesnt just frequent Birdies: "I come here everyday. There's a very friendly atmosphere and the drinks are moderately priced and I always have a good time. I like it better than Starlight, I didn't come here for over a year until (the new management took over)."
While I was taking to Jared, Christina coyly asked him if he was going to be on the cover of another magazine. I replied, "He's being harassed by the media" and smiled.
I found Edward Marcellus, another regular, and he gave his two cents about Birdies. "Five Points is the social center-point. I like Birdie's because of the people, the owners and staff... all of it. It's changed a lot (for the better) with the new owners."
Of course some things never change: While we were chatting about the improvements, a bruiser of a bouncer drug a drunk guy and a random girl out of the bar.
It was accompanied by the usual mayhem--the guy running on about how unfair it all was etc..
Further investigation revealed he was harassing some poor girl and was 'asked' to leave. The obvious upside about a woman owned bar! What a jerk... seriously.
I must say, Birdie's did a great job of getting the jerk out of the bar without a fist-fight.
I found Chris by the bar with my empty cocktail from Wall Street and just as I was about to give my opinion of that, he handed me an Undertow--Erin, the bartender's, specialty. Apparently she invented the Undertow herself.
It's made with Stoli Raspberry, Blue Curacao, Sour Mix, and Chambord. The Raspberryness continued.
It tasted compellingly like a Blue SnoCone. Hard to complain about that.
With that, we left the beautiful people of Five Points and headed on to the next location.
The Patio is much cleaner and brighter at Birdies.
Jared Chase Bowser, of Sunbears, a regular at Birdies
Edward Marcellus, Birdies in Five Points
In Cahoots 11:49 pm to 12:23 pm
S(3) + CZ(5) + CF(4) + FMS(3) + D(5) + Bonus(3)
5
Finding Incahoots was interesting.... What is it about gay bars in this town that they seem to find the absolute worst sections of town to locate in?
InCahoots is on Edison Avenue in the shadow of Blue Cross Blue Shield, which at night is basically at the corner of Crackrock and Attempted Auto Theft.
We made it to Cracktown and thought we were going in the wrong direction.
(editor's note. The neighborhood, we assure you is actually pretty lovely. Everbank Plaza and Blue Cross Blue Shield. However to suburban children weaned on too many mad max movies, anything dark and industrial looking is bound to be frightening. Like filling out tax returns)
Alas, a parking guy pointed us down the dark, creepy street. Seeing as how it was cold and scary, we all linked arms and walked toward the venue, huddled together for safety and warmth. Outside there was a man setting up his food stand which served wings, gizzard fries, chicken fries, pork chop fries... yes everything was fried, except for the cake. Jordan and I are vegetarian, so we demurred. For some reason, Christopher, a natural carnivore, claimed the same.
There are three bars inside InCahoots, a small bar to the left, a medium bar to the right, and if you walk straight on in, you'll find the largest bar ----and some of the burly exhibition dancers.
We immediately sought out the owner, Stacy, and the Cabaret goddess, Karrissa Wade, one of the most famous cabaret stars in the state.
She took us to the small bar and we were served a Madras by Mikey, the bartender. While hardly an imaginative choice, Mr. Mikey made up for it by serving us---by far----the strongest drink We've ever been served on a club crawl yet. Maybe the strongest drink thats ever been served. Ever.
Technically, it's made with Vodka, orange juice and cranberry juice. As far as I can testify its made with pure rocket fuel.
While alcoholic steam was venting though our ears, Mikey shared his thoughts about the Madras, "It's really good and easy to drink because it gets you drunk fast!"
I could hardly agree more. One cannot imagine surviving more than five of them. In a lifetime.
Karissa Wade was brooking no nonsense on the subject of drinking for our 18 year old cohort. Archly and with a little too much publicity as far as any of us were concerned, she grandly offered Jordan a can of coke with a straw, practically announcing:, "Here's a coke for the little boy ....we're out of milk!" The bitch might as well have used a megaphone, muttered someone, I think it was Jordan.
There are go go boys dancing on the bar. We were seated nearTristan Fiore, a really cute guy sporting costume football underwear.
Jordan whispers to me, "He's totally stuffing! At least he's being funny about it; wearing football underwear and all."
We giggled about that for a few minutes before meeting Temptation, "The One, The Only, The Beautiful", and her friend Ryan Trujillo. I wanted Ryan's impression of InCahoots since it was his first time out. "I'll be back, it's different, yet cool. I came with Temptation to watch her perform."
The bar was packed and festive, lots of crazy dance action, and the deejays were playing homefried gay disco house. The crowd was restless, drunk, schmoozy and ready for adventure. I ditched the guys in the dance bar to take the bathroom shots.
So, here I was, standing in the stalls of the bathroom when a woman asked with real fear and outrage in her voice, "What are you doing?!"
I wheeled to her and blurted out a hundred miles an hour, "I don't have a bathroom fetish, I swear! It's part of my job."
There was a tense, unbearable moment. She stared. I stared back.
How do you explain to perfect strangers that you have a job photographing bathrooms? In context it seems indefensible. Suddenly she laughed. Nervously I laughed back. She brayed. i brayed just as loud. Then she disappeared.
Still laughing about the photos, and I walked back out towards the dance floor. I decided, or rather the Madras decided for me to stand on a chair to get a good crowd shot, I stood atop it wobbling and looked down to see a panicked bouncer. Apparently one doesnt stand on bar stools after one has been visibly drinking.
We had a great time dancing and hanging out with the crowd, but soon it was time for Chris, Jordan and I to leave.
Apparently while we were enjoying the place, a chain of events set in motion by the photos of the bathroom had rapidly developed. We, of course, were oblivious.
As we reached the edge of the parking lot we heard "Stop! Wait! Where are you going?!" We turned to see two ladies rushing to catch up to us. this was one of the five last things anyone would want to see in the neighborhood. The first being one's parents, and the second being a deadly creature or a maniac with a machine gun.
This was only three steps behind that.
Chris took the lead. And by lead, I mean that I rapidly moved behind him and Jordan considered peeing on himself. They got closer. I relaxed. It was Stacy the bar owner.
Maybe I had forgotten something in the bar.
Instead it got aggressive and forbidding all at once: "People are telling me that you're taking photos of the bathrooms, Why are you taking photos of the bathrooms?!"
It was clear that this activity was the source of some strange suspicion. Had we transgressed some unwritten code?
Chris, on cue, hilariously started explaining why it's important to take photos of bathrooms in club reviews. He spoke at great length---from the way he explained it, our very way of life depended on the clean bathrooms of night clubs.
Stacy was far from convinced. She demanded my camera.
Now it was my turn to be unconvinced. There was a moment.
Show her the caaaameeraaa, said Christopher.
Reluctantly I handed it to her. She flipped through the photos of the bathrooms and then suddenly everything was a ok. She sweetened and laughed and invited us back
We were left to leave of our own volition.
Which we did.
Temptation and Ryan Trujillo
Off into the night back to the Park and King district, where a little trio of clubs has transformed the little area into another pleasurably walkable nightspot.
This is still an edge area at night, but there are enough people on the street that it seems perfectly safe to walk back and forth in a group. The older buildings are still there in little pockets of junkiness, but the new places are kind of blooming and the effect is one of a place in transition.
The area is home to Walkers, Park Place, and Kickbacks. We were scheduled for all three.
Walkers 12: 25 am to 12: 48 am
S(4) + CZ(2) + CF(4) + FMS(5) + D(5) + Bonus(2)
5
When I arrived, Shawn Lightfoot was strumming on the guitar. He was singing a song about Walker's and Kickbacks... it was pretty cool. Local chanteuse Jessica Pounds was in the audience, hanging out with friends and listening to the music.
This venue is really upscale with nice couches, exposed brick, and awesome lighting. The atmosphere is really comforting and it's a place that you could spend all night getting to know people and listening to wonderful music.
I headed for the bar, to get a drink from Scott, the owner. He made me a champagne cocktail with watermelon puree in it. It was so amazing. It's almost like drinking a watermelon jolly rancher. The cocktails are 7 dollars each.
The wine prices are from $3 to $ 10 each glass and there are over 100 champagnes and wines. They also carry Sake infused drinks with apple, cinnamon and grape. There's only one word for it... WOW!
I spoke with Andrew, one of the regulars. He mentioned to me that I should try the Bing Cho, and that the wines are good and the prices are good, too. Before leaving, Andrew told me that he'd be coming back to Walkers again. We concurred.
There isn't any smoking allowed inside of Walkers, but there are plenty of chairs and tables outside to hang out, chat with friends, and listen to live music. Inside top 40's
favorites were playing which was a contrast to the music outside.
Park Place 12:50 am to 1:10 am
S(5) + CZ(2) + CF(4) + FMS(5) + D(3) + Bonus(0)
5
This is a cozy little place, tucked away in Riverside. The atmosphere is quite comfortable and I got along with everyone. The crowd is really friendly and they don't mind talking up a storm.
Shawn Simmons, the manager, greeted the Metrojacksonville Club Crawl team at the bar. He quickly introduced us to John Henrique, his favorite bartender. John made us his special drink, A Parrot on Crack ---Parrot Bay, Peach Schnapps, Red Bull and Raspberry Liquor. I took the time to ask John about working at Park Place: "I love working here because it's a neighborhood bar."
Shawn and John went on to describe the drink specials: 2-4-1 beer $3.50 (Amstel, Corona, Heineken) Wells and Call drinks, Sunday is all day Happy Hour.... There was a second bar that was filled with women, but we hung out with Shawn and John.
I introduced myself to Aiden Klein, a regular at Park Place, and a MetroJacksonville Reader who informed me, "I've been coming here for 10 years. There is a good atmosphere, good music, and the bartenders cater to your every need. I order so much here that I get free drinks occasionally! They really love their regulars here. The bartenders are steady, they don't have any of turn-over. When I walk in, they fix my drink for me without asking me what I want. I had the choice to move back to Jacksonville, Florida or to Seattle, Washington and I chose Jacksonville after reading the MetroJacksonville Reviews. I realized that Jacksonville is up-and-coming. Jacksonville is starting to keep up with Los Angeles, New York City, and Miami. I am very impressed with Jacksonville, Florida!"
Chris weighs in, "There is a small, neglected dance floor. No one is dancing!"
He also pointed out the two pool tables that sat there without being used, how sad they must have been, indeed.
Why would a bar be full of people who arent playing pool or dancing?
Um...I think it's because everyone was busy chatting with one another, but that's just me.
Despite the fact that Kickbacks is literally across the street, Christopher informed us that we would be going instead to Eclipse in Avondale next.
We demurred to his more experienced judgement.
Manager Shawn Simmons and Bartender John Henrique
Park Place regular, Aiden Klein
Eclipse 1:15 am to 1:32 am
S(4) + CZ(3) + CF(3) + FMS(4) + D(3) + Bonus()
5
The Eclipse is a small nightclub with a big great personality to it. The owner, Jeff, was also disk jockeying that night as DJ Free. He was spinning 80's music, but didn't mind stopping to talk to our team and point us in the right direction in order to get drinks and mingle. The staff were all so friendly and helpful,--a nice contrast to being scared to death at Incahoots, but... well... that was so long ago.... wasn't it?
We ordered a Pineapple Upside Down Cake Shot prepared by Terry, the bartender. It tasted just like the cake... it was waaaaaaay to sweet and it's really a girlie drink. They had $2 Yuengling, $3 Amstel lights, and $4 Captain Morgan as drink specials. Which suited our tastes just fine.
Madilyn Peterson and her friend, Justin were also newbies to Eclipse that night. We chatted them up and found out that they would most definitely come back, they like the different atmosphere and the eclectic music, come on, admit it....80's is cool!
Random guy comes over to me and starts taking my picture. This was the beginning of something special. The place was pretty full of fun and cute boys, so once again I abandoned the guys to their own devices
There is an outdoor patio that stays just about as full as the indoor dancefloor.
All of the hook up action is around the bar, where people make eye contact and introductions.
This place has a longtime reputation for hip fun people, and this night was no exception.
But soon the hour grew late and it was time to head out to gay megaclub: The Metro.
Sunter Charles and Jennifer Browning
Eclipse Regular, Madilyn Peterson
Metro 1: 45 am to 2:10 am
S(5) + CZ(3) + CF(3) + FMS(5) + D(3) + Bonus(3)
5
The Metro is the largest nightclub in the area. It is also the largest gay and lesbian Night club in the city and features Drag Shows, strippers, cabaret performances, a piano bar and several specialty bars as well as an adult shop inside the facility.
Finally the normally quiet and morose, Jordan perked right up.
Inside, after passing through the unecessarily grueling door ceremony, We met Jerry Burton, the manager on duty, who introduced us to the bar staff and showed us around a bit. I ordered a Trainwreck, the bartender's (James) special drink which has Southern Comfort, Peach Schnapps, Hypnotique, and Cranberry juice in it. It was a really sweet, sparkly drink... You'd have to be a college girl to enjoy it, which I am, but then again it was also pretty appropriate.
There was an amateur strip contest going on in the main room and the crowd was going wild! It was hard to think over the hoots, hollers, screams and yells. It was a quite interesting experience.
I met Chris Stephens and Emily (Gosh, I hope that is your name, dear... your signature looks like a 3 year old scribbling on a coloring sheet!) at the bar I asked Chris about the Metro. "It's my first time here and I wouldn't come back. I like the Pearl much better."
Then he starts rambling on... and on.... and on....about the Pearl. Note to self: Find Chris Stephens the next time I'm doing a PEARL Review, I'm sure I can get some good information from him. Unfortunately, the Pearl wasn't on my list tonight, dude. Chris had to keep Emily standing upright as she was by far the most drunk person we discovered on this outing.
It was quite amusing... she'd wander off... he'd retrieve her....
Christopher mentions that he doesn't think that the large room we're in is the only part of the bar. Jordan and I followed him to the Rainbow Room which is this awesome little piano bar tucked away inside the Metro. The piano music was light and well played, a group of regulars sits around and sings along. Altogether a wonderful experience. We sat down with our drinks and relaxed for a few minutes.
I found out that in all, there are 7 separate bars inside the Metro, it's a pity that we only got to see two of them! I had no idea that this club was so enormous.
Unfortunately Last Call came, and brought our discotheque experience to an end.
Collecting up Jordan we bundled into the car and headed back to the Post and King district.
Kickbacks 2:19 am to 4:20 am
S(3) + CZ(4) + CF(5) + FMS(5) + D(4) + Bonus(2)
5
We dragged ourselves into Kickbacks, after going to 12 other places, with gigantic appetites to match. We sat down and spoke with our waitress, Lea, to grab our drinks... ----water at that point since it was after 2am. I ended up ordering a coffee as well, considering I was having a hard time keeping my eyes open.
We met the owner, Steve Flores, and he is a wealth of information. If you get him talking about Gastropubs he'll chatter on, ad infinitum, for quite some time. A Gastropub is a bar that serves food that is better than you'd think it would be and it originated in England. I'd say that describes Kickbacks' food selection quite well. You can get anything you want from Ramen noodles to appetizers to Beer Dinners! I will definitely be in attendance to the next beer dinner. Steve plans some of them for 3 or more years. All of the food and beer go together and there is vegetarian fare as well! Steve, if we fell asleep during your talk it wasn't because it was boring, we were exhausted!
Kickbacks also has the most extensive food menu that I've ever seen. There are 6 pages, one sided, of items that can be ordered well into the morning. The MetroJacksonville team tried the appetizer platter with fried green beans, mozzarella sticks, Jalapeno poppers with Cheddar Cheese, and the Onion Blooms as well as the Mediterranian Pizza. The food filled us up quite well.
Steve answered the age old question, "How to you pronounce Hogaarden?" With a simple show of a 6 pack of Hogaarden beers. He took out the middle one, lifted up the box to reveal, WHO GAR DEN, written on the box. The waitresses came by and all started whooing like owls. I'll never ask for a hoe garden or a hoe in the garden again... it's forever... whooooooooooooooo garden.
Kickbacks clearly has the largest beer selection in Jacksonville with over 420 bottled beers and 60 on tap, soon to be 80. The prices range from $1.75 to $100. Steve said that he has a few patrons who have actually tried getting all the beers on the menu as well as all the food, but it's hard for them to accomplish that task when the beer selections are constantly changing!
And so finally, exhausted but ecstatic, we finally drew the evening to a close. 4:20 in the morning, we had seen everything, done everything tasteful, chatted up half of the universe, and danced, sweated, drank, and thoroughly enjoyed the evening.
Riverside's diversity of clubs and the enormous range of experiences makes it a pretty great area of town to do a pub crawl.
We hardly had a single experience the entire evening that was unpleasant, and more than a few that were just hilarious and thrilling.
Definitely Riverside has it going on for the nightlife scene.
--The Crash Trash and Weekend Bash Club Review Team.--
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Bewler
October 23, 2009, 01:08:44 PMSo basically, never go to incahoots. No problem!
mandy6488
October 23, 2009, 01:22:19 PMHey Brett, wanna go to In Cahoots tonight?
Cashbah should have minus 8395825 points because..they are ALWAYS out of something we are looking for. Seriously, Steph told the waitress one time that they should rename the bar "Sorry, We're out of that".. I went there for wino wed.. they supposedly have 3 bottles to choose from.. the had none and the only one they were willing to substitute in was a nasty white blendo of some sort. The next time I went.. no strongbow and none of the tobacco flavors I wanted...and they weren't blue mist or plum either! This has happened every time for the past like.. 2 months!!
Um, so yeah.. there is my little Mandy rant about Casbah.. =D I'd love it if they would actually do inventory and keep things in stock..
I <3 Walkers. The fruit spritzer things and the champagne mojitos are awwwwwesome! I could probably drink 82475925 of them.
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 01:29:49 PMSeriously?
Jordan apparently was fixated on the things that Casbah runs out of as well.
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 01:32:16 PMThey actually had a good time at InCahoots, I think Jennifer was just a little scared of the neighborhood and the consequences of photography!
Bewler
October 23, 2009, 01:41:18 PMAh, I was going to say the area it's located doesn't seem all that bad. It's within walking distance from my work and I've never felt like I've had to be more on my guard around here than normal.
But it still sounds like some of the people there could have been nicer to you guys.
Mandy let's face it, Laylas has better hookahs. Now if they would only not charge so much for drinks.
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 01:51:09 PMThe team perused the specialty drink menu, but decided to leave some of their suggested drink combinations to more adventurous drinkers.
One particularly revolting sounding concoction is called the "Chocolate Covered Raspberry" which is Guiness and Lambic together.... interesting. Personally, it sounds like a bit of a stretch. I would suggest Raspberry Flavored Retching....
As it turned out Jordan Rutter is an old hand at the Casbah and started discussing the hookah's, apparently they're out of tobacco flavors quite frequently. Specifically, (and with tart disatisfaction) he mentioned that the Blue Mist and Plum flavors were out the most.
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 02:04:26 PMFor all the newcomers to Crash Trash and Weekend Bash! Here are the previous chapters:
http://www.metrojacksonville.com/article/2009-sep-crash-trash-and-weekend-bash-the-mj-club-crawl
http://www.metrojacksonville.com/article/2009-oct-crash-trash-and-weekend-bash-downtown-part-2
And here are the ranking of the clubs up until the latest edition, which will update by saturday:
http://www.metrojacksonville.com/article/2009-oct-metrojacksonville-club-ratings-scorecard
GideonGlib
October 23, 2009, 02:06:55 PMYeah....umm, wow.
stephElf
October 23, 2009, 02:12:21 PMCasbah is out of everything all the time... beer, wine and hookahs.
And they will only give you 2 sets of coals and they bring them early. In other words, you don't get to finish all your tobacco because you are out of fire.
Layla's and Al Him (not a fan.... for now) will bring you coals till the tobacco dies. I mean seriously, 2 coals costs all of about 50 cents.
But yea. Layla's prices are best for happy hour/specials... either that or split a pitcher of beer.
David
October 23, 2009, 03:14:55 PMProps to metjax for this set of nightclub reviews. It has a more objective point of view than the previous two, sticking closer to the formula you guys originally came up with, as opposed to giving 50 bonus points because of a hunky bartender
The only discrepancy I see is the claim of the metro being the biggest night club around. Maybe that's true for the core area, but what about the mega clubs of Arlington & Southside? Plush, The Globe and (not sure if this one's still open) Bourbon St Station. Those places are massive.
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 03:24:09 PMI think that what they were saying david. It was the biggest in the Riverside Crawl.
Thanks for the props man! This was a lot of fun to put together and edit! Im sure the lovely Miss Browning and the rest of the crew will be on. surely they have rolled out of bed by now.
Bewler
October 23, 2009, 03:29:14 PMWhat ever happened with the slapping? Will that be on a future update?
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 03:30:58 PMIts an addendum. Im trying to get all the parties to see if they can come up with one consistent story.
stug
October 23, 2009, 03:32:22 PM3.4 FOR WALL STREET? Bite your tongues (fingers?). A genuine dive bar and an institution. I'll be there tonight, waiting to die.
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 03:34:37 PMIts been a while since I really looked at the nightlife environment of the district as a whole, this article really made me realize how diverse the neighborhood is.
It also really made it clear that the creation of these walkable little nodes over the past 8 years has made the district awesome.
Five Points, Park and King, Post and King, the Avondale district. They have become one of the things that makes Jacksonville itself wonderful.
fsu813
October 23, 2009, 03:35:26 PMi agree 100%
shanshan1218
October 23, 2009, 03:39:15 PMfirst time in years i have been to the eclipse and you end up with a picture of my drunk ass with my beer in one hand and my mouth wide open....oh god!!! take it down....lol i have tons of good ones from that night....i didnt' even know yall were coming!!
shanshan1218
October 23, 2009, 03:40:03 PMFive Points, Park and King, Post and King, the Avondale district. They have become one of the things that makes Jacksonville itself wonderful.
[/quote]
amen steven!!!
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 03:48:04 PMlol. shan shan. Is that you?! Awesome!
The team had a lot of fun at Eclipse that night. Christopher Byron Phillips apparently loves the place.
oceandrive33
October 23, 2009, 03:53:47 PMhi.. okay.. eclipse needs a better raiting than that.. the drinks where definatley strong, the music was amazing.. and i have 100 more pics to chose from if you would take that one down please!!! oli was also there that night.. and if i saw you out i would buy you a drink as a big thanks!
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 03:58:19 PMyou know if you have the photos on flickr, you should post them here!
David
October 23, 2009, 04:05:13 PMThanks for the props man! This was a lot of fun to put together and edit! Im sure the lovely Miss Browning and the rest of the crew will be on. surely they have rolled out of bed by now.
Speaking of, how far out will the club crawl reach? It would be...interesting to see a review of a place like Plush or the Globe, (all of which I haven't been to in nearly half decade). But maybe as a last resort, when you run out of places around here. Jax Beach seems like it should be one of next areas on the list, there's no shortage of places to review there.
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 04:09:09 PMWe are going to cover the whole city.
As we build up people, material and manpower the section will be organized by night of the week and section of town.
Veronica Dame is working on a list of all the drink specials and cheap drinks in the urban core right now, hopefully we should have something ready to go on that shortly.
mandy6488
October 23, 2009, 04:16:34 PMThe team perused the specialty drink menu, but decided to leave some of their suggested drink combinations to more adventurous drinkers.
One particularly revolting sounding concoction is called the "Chocolate Covered Raspberry" which is Guiness and Lambic together.... interesting. Personally, it sounds like a bit of a stretch. I would suggest Raspberry Flavored Retching....
As it turned out Jordan Rutter is an old hand at the Casbah and started discussing the hookah's, apparently they're out of tobacco flavors quite frequently. Specifically, (and with tart disatisfaction) he mentioned that the Blue Mist and Plum flavors were out the most.
One a side note, I've actually tried the Chocolate Covered Raspberry and I think it's pretty tasty. The one at Kickback's is better though b/c they use one of the chocolate stouts instead of Guinness.
mandy6488
October 23, 2009, 04:18:13 PMBut it still sounds like some of the people there could have been nicer to you guys.
Mandy let's face it, Laylas has better hookahs. Now if they would only not charge so much for drinks.
Oh I love Layla's hookahs (I almost wrote hookers there, wtf?). I loved Layla's when we had Nick hooking us up! Now I spend $40 when I'm there each time. ::sigh::
oceandrive33
October 23, 2009, 04:20:20 PMStephen.. I will get them on flicker asap.. once dj free played duran duran.. I knew it was gonna be a good night...
mandy6488
October 23, 2009, 04:22:32 PMSpeaking of, how far out will the club crawl reach? It would be...interesting to see a review of a place like Plush or the Globe, (all of which I haven't been to in nearly half decade). But maybe as a last resort, when you run out of places around here. Jax Beach seems like it should be one of next areas on the list, there's no shortage of places to review there.
Oh wow, I can't even imagine walking back into Plush or Bourbon Street... but I do sometimes wonder what they are like now. It's been years!
I wonder if we could get the old 98 crew to go on a nice little reminiscing trip to Plush..hehe I'd be interested to see if we look super old compared to the rest of the crowd or if it's aged at all..
Er, and by 98 crew I mean Rachel and Brett could come too, of course.. =D
Bewler
October 23, 2009, 04:39:37 PMAnd since it's 98, after Plush it's on to Evolutions from 2 - 6 am.
subro
October 23, 2009, 04:43:24 PMI would also recommend spending more time in less places. While you can get a sense of some bars within seconds, I don't feel that spending less then 30 mins in some bars is sufficient to really appreciate them. I love the articles as I don’t get out much anymore and it is good to see the variety that Jacksonville has to offer.
Christopher Byron Phillip
October 23, 2009, 06:53:45 PMYes we should be spending more time in less places.....I think Stephen was trying to challenge us....
Ooh, and just for the record, I'm not semi-conservative or on the prowl (although I may look the part)
Where to next Stephen?
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 06:55:06 PMIt looks like the Southbank is next my friend.
Bewler
October 23, 2009, 07:01:25 PMYeah a good example of this is Wallstreet. I've always really liked the place but it can be almost depressing if you get there too early.
stephendare
October 23, 2009, 07:05:43 PMgreat point!
That is exactly the reason why the times are posted on every review!
Jennifer Browning
October 24, 2009, 11:51:00 AMInCahoots was a lot of fun.... I just didn't like the neighborhood that much, and the consequences of my bathroom shots were quite unnerving, but, it's okay.
Atari007
October 24, 2009, 11:58:11 AMGood reviews! I'd like to see an address or something with each of the bars/clubs though. Amazingly enough, there are some places that were reviewed that I have never even heard of. Ok, maybe just one place so far: InCahoots. I gathered that it was a gay bar, which is probably why I have never heard of it, but just as an example I have no idea where that place is. Just saying that addresses of these places would be nice!
One other thing would be nice would to have something specifying things like orientation. Id hate to plan a night out at a place just to get there and find out that it is a gay bar... (no offense obviously, but, well... you know.)
stephendare
October 24, 2009, 04:09:39 PMIll go back and add the addresses.
Jennifer Browning
October 24, 2009, 08:09:15 PMOne other thing would be nice would to have something specifying things like orientation. Id hate to plan a night out at a place just to get there and find out that it is a gay bar... (no offense obviously, but, well... you know.)
Adding the addresses is a great idea! Thank you!
David
October 25, 2009, 02:06:31 PMhah what's going on with the logo to the crash/trash weekend bash article? scooby doo, hellboy? hahahhahaha. Nice! I like it.
Ernest Street
October 27, 2009, 01:38:18 PMWord has spread! "The JB Bathroom Cam" has inadvertently helped clean up restrooms all over Jax!
Club owners beware! Your bathroom could be next onstage. ......(Wow, Kickbacks was pretty bad..)
mtraininjax
October 27, 2009, 02:18:31 PMIt normally is, sorry Steve, but how freakin hard is it for you or Mikey to clean the damn bathroom, or make it part of the staff's responsibility. Sure people pull items off the wall or punch holes in the wall, but dude, your clientele is not the normal Ritz-Carlton patron. The bathrooms were cleaner when Pete and Rebecca ran the place, fix the bathrooms, or we might as well use the street as our toilet.....wait.....some at 2 am do that....not good.
playnjville
November 02, 2009, 09:52:49 PMI want to address your review of InCahoots Nightclub. I've been going to InCahoots for a couple years now, and have a problem with a couple of the things you said about it and the Gay bar community as a whole. First of all, your comment about this bar being on the corner of "Crackrock & Attempted Auto Theft" was WAY OUT OF LINE & inaccurate. I'm sure the businesses of BCBS, Fidelity Bank, Everbank, The Art Gallery, The Daycare or the other Businesses wouldn't appreciate your slanderous comments about their neighborhood! The streets are very well lit up & the club always has 1-2 security guards in the parking lots to show you where to park and direct you to the club. How is that a "Dark Creepy Street"? Why were you so scared? Next you mentioned next the food vendor.... well just so you know, me and many other InCahoots regulars have been known to stop by there on other nights after parting elsewhere just to get that "fried" food you mentioned!! It's awesome! Next, how about an accuracy check.... Last time I checked there were 4 bars there not the 3 you mentioned. You had to walk right past it to get to the bathroom. Which is another problem I have! Your article made mention of the owner coming after you to see what was in your camera, like it was a bad thing. I feel reassurred that she did come after you and wasn't ok about the fact that you were taking pictures in the bathroom! (Now that to me is creepy!) Next time you should Let the owner know that you are taking a picture of the bathrooms and have an employee there so you don't scare the hell out of the customers like you did! In Closing I have 2 questions??? Why is there an 18 yr old on your staff reviewing clubs when he's barely old enough to get in them.... What experience can he possible have? AND WHAT THE HELL IS HOMEFRIED GAY DISCO HOUSE?? Inquiring Gay minds wanna know??
hannahb
November 02, 2009, 10:18:32 PMThis page was forwarded to me from a friend about Incahoots, and i felt the need to respond.
Lets start off by saying that Incahoots got the highest rating along with Kickbacks of all the clubs that were rated in riverside. How is that your comments were so derogatory? Your assessment of the location and the parking set up was really over-dramatized(drama queen???). This review seems very unprofessional. You referred to Karrissa as a bitch for doing her job and giving your barely- legal colleague a canned soda as is their policy. Him being thin skinned about his age shows he has no business in a club to begin with.
As far as the owner's way of handling your whole bathroom trauma, i applaud her diligence in ensuring her patron's privacy, and frankly i would be quite upset to walk out of a stall and find someone taking pictures of the bathroom that i was in.
And I too am curious what home fried gay disco house is? The music is awesome and the dance floor is always packed. By the way. the shrimp,chicken strips,wings and pork chops ROCK!!!!!!!
mtraininjax
November 02, 2009, 10:21:23 PMNo such thing as bad publicity!
RiversideLoki
November 03, 2009, 09:41:00 AMTPC
November 03, 2009, 10:25:16 AMSo are all the owners now aware of the reviewers coming to check out their bar?
stephendare
November 03, 2009, 01:32:58 PMHannah.
Karrissa Wade is a contributor and friend of this publication. Im sure if you actually spoke to her about the review she would laugh right along with us, as she is one of the contributing writers for this section.
The crash trash and weekend bash is a review article, written for consumers, not marketting written for the businesses, and you yourself mentioned that the club got a great rating in spite of the funny commentary within the article.
And as far as the food goes, not all of us can be carnivores, Im sure a day will come when a non vegetarian comes to the club.
Jennifer Browning
November 03, 2009, 05:43:43 PMAs far as the owner's way of handling your whole bathroom trauma, i applaud her diligence in ensuring her patron's privacy, and frankly i would be quite upset to walk out of a stall and find someone taking pictures of the bathroom that i was in.
Hannah,
I'd like to know where the idea that I was taking pictures of people in the bathrooms came from. Have you ever seen a picture of people in the bathrooms in these articles? She was walking into the bathrooms, not the stall. Perhaps you shouldn't assume so much.
Jennifer
stephendare
November 03, 2009, 05:49:03 PMseriously! and besides if you think the incahoots review was rough, you should check out some of the others!
playnjville
November 03, 2009, 07:08:55 PMFROM HANNA ..As far as the owner's way of handling your whole bathroom trauma, i applaud her diligence in ensuring her patron's privacy, and frankly i would be quite upset to walk out of a stall and find someone taking pictures of the bathroom that i was in.
Hannah,
I'd like to know where the idea that I was taking pictures of people in the bathrooms came from. Have you ever seen a picture of people in the bathrooms in these articles? She was walking into the bathrooms, not the stall. Perhaps you shouldn't assume so much.
Jennifer
Jennifer.....
I'd say Jennifer that the idea came from you in your article!! (or do you not read the crap you print) You yourself said a customer "Said with FEAR & OUTRAGE".... "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" So if a customer had a serious problem with it while your doing it... why wouldn't the owner have a problem?? If she had to come to you upset about it then I'm sure there were problems that others complained to her as well.. Did you ask?
You handled the whole thing unprofessionally and aren't woman enough to admit it. Instead you try to make the owner look bad to cover your mess! Then jump on your readers for defending the right thing!?!?
So clearly the assumption was on your part that it's OK to go in a bar & start taking pictures in a bathroom without knowledge or permission of the Establishment. Or at least an employee there to reassure the customers there that it's OK. Bottom line... Your commentary is unprofessional & rude.
Stephendare
Whether Karissa is a writer on your staff or not, I feel it was unnecessary to "print" the bitch comment when she was clearly doing her job. You say this is for the consumers not the businesses.... that's great Really! But how is calling an employee a Bitch for doing her job a help to me as a consumer? How is bad mouthing the "Fried Meat & Seafood" they serve, Just because your a vegan, a help to me?
The club did get a great rating as it should have, but the rude & nasty (that you called funny??) commentary was totally unnecessary!! How about Teaching your girl some professionalism. This is a published article... not her personal diary!! JUST MY OPINION AS A CONSUMER!
mtraininjax
November 03, 2009, 07:11:38 PMGo get 'em Jennifer, don't take any crap from them!
Stephen - Agreed, I'd like to see you take the show on the road to the bars mentioned in the Times Union for having guns, namely the Silver FOXX on Beaver Street.
http://jacksonville.com/news/metro/2009-11-02/story/jacksonville_bars_nightclubs_keep_an_eye_out_for_guns
Sportmotor
November 03, 2009, 07:32:58 PMStephen - Agreed, I'd like to see you take the show on the road to the bars mentioned in the Times Union for having guns, namely the Silver FOXX on Beaver Street.
http://jacksonville.com/news/metro/2009-11-02/story/jacksonville_bars_nightclubs_keep_an_eye_out_for_guns
Been to the Silver Foxx(on a dare, I am a unthreating lookin white boy at first glance)
scared the hell outa me
mtraininjax
November 03, 2009, 07:45:50 PMscared the hell outa me
Hence the article from the T-U. I would like to see the inside of Plush, but I am not sure how many MJ readers attend regular Plush events. Never been myself. Apparently I won't be going to incahoots to take pictures either.
playnjville
November 03, 2009, 08:09:48 PMHence the article from the T-U. I would like to see the inside of Plush, but I am not sure how many MJ readers attend regular Plush events. Never been myself. Apparently I won't be going to incahoots to take pictures either.[/quote
I guess you won't, considering most of the clubs in Riverside don't allow camera's. Sad to say, but Not everyone is able to be out of the closet. One wrong picture posted online could cost them their job or their family relationships. But outside of the drama asscoiated with the reviewer, you'd probably have a blast there if you ever did decide to check it out! It's a really fun place.
Sportmotor
November 03, 2009, 08:22:11 PMand as far as incahoots goes, I have been there MANY times and not to long ago, guess less then 3 weeks ago. Never impressed, actually its always dissapointing and the review was nicer then what I would have said about it.
mtraininjax
November 03, 2009, 08:45:42 PMI'm not here to judge, so I won't.
playnjville
November 03, 2009, 10:04:30 PMHmmmm... You've been there MANY times..... & your dissapointed... yet you keep going back?? ... MANY TIMES
But, I'm truly am sorry to hear that you didn't enjoy it. Not every place is for everyone. And, Everyone is entittled to their opinion. Most any given night it's one of the most packed bar's ("slam'd" every Fri & Sat as well) out of all the Bar's in Riverside along with Kickback's (which is also an awesome place).
Bewler
November 04, 2009, 10:36:18 AMI have. Getting shot at plush would be what I consider a mercy killing. I’d rather be getting wheeled out on a stretcher than have to spend an evening at that god awful place. Bad music, lame crowd, armed drunks (apparently). I think I’d rather choose death.
stephendare
November 04, 2009, 06:37:57 PMWell PlaynJville
Im sure that we all feel your pain. It must be simply dreadful to be such an unreconstructed literalist of the first degree!
Im not sure how our reviews are going to help you as a consumer, but I have suggestions about how a class in literature will help you as a reader.
The reviews are playful and catty. That is called 'tone'.
Karrissa Wade, one of the most famous cabaret performers in the State of Florida, whose reputation is only matched by Miss P in Orlando, plays a catty evil performer on stage and in character.
Her comment was hilarious at our reviewers expense, which we printed, with the suitable rejoinder for such a stingingly funny observation.
I do not consider the word to be an insult, and having spoken to her, She did not either, and in fact uses it to describe herself at every available conversations (see www.bigbonedandbossy.blogspot.com)
I am certainly proud of Jennifer and her work here, and think she has one of the more interesting columns going in the city. Her professionalism isnt in question. I think its perfectly acceptable to have a little light hearted fun in the articles, and her posts are often more of a statement about her own foibles and limitations as they are about any place she visits.
Jennifer is telling the truth from the point of view of the excellent fun loving kind of college age girl she is. People can see that in her writing, and they can make their own conclusions about how they would feel in the same situations. I like this much better than trying to pretend that there is some kind of objective all knowing voice of god speaking in the back ground.
The objective part comes in the ratings, and it seems kind of silly that anyone would complain about the review when you look at the actual rating they recieved.
lighten up and stop being such a literalist.
playnjville
November 04, 2009, 08:02:45 PMWow Stephendare!! You sure do like the sound of your own voice (in this case writing) don't you!!
You say I'm a unreconstructed literalist because I disagree with the you & the professionalism of your writer?
WHATEVER .... Calling me names because you can't handle criticism is pathetic!!
But that's OK, I've seen your writing/responses to others that have had critical responses to your other weekend bash reviews and you did the same to them!
And, you saying that your not sure how these reviews will help us as a consumer is kinda funny since wasn't your exact words a few sections up "The crash trash and weekend bash is a review article, written for consumers not businesses. . So your writing it for us but no clue how it's supposed to help us... HMMM OK?
I've know Karissa for 13 years now, and I agree that calling her a Bitch in fun or in show is def part of the norm, but in this case it wasn't at the reviewer's expense (as you stated) , it was at her expense for doing her job. Twist it how you want, but the facts are obvious!
You say the objective part comes in the ratings, but you of all people MR LITERARY MAN should know that words can hurt much more than numbers. Especially when they are inaccurate and overdramatized.
I'm sure that you and Jennifer are both are really nice people ... AS AM I.... And, It really wasn't my intention to turn this into this mess that it has become, but when I as a consumer see unprofessional & innaccurate things written about a club that I, ALONG WITH NAMY OTHERS LOVE (which is why they are usually slammed), then I felt the need a a COMSUMER to respond.
Although I highly disagree with you, & the way you handle things, I do wish you all well.
THE "RATING" THEY GOT WAS AWESOME - THANKS FOR AT LEAST THAT!!!
THE CLUB IS AWESOME - THE LOTS ARE SAFE - THE MUSIC IS AWESOME- THE FOOD IS DELICIOUS
THE DRINKS ARE STRONG - THE CLUB IS PACKED & CLEARLY THE OWNER IS LOOKING OUT FOR US!
DEF MY KIND OF CLUB!!!!
stephendare
November 04, 2009, 08:28:15 PMSaying that you are a literalist isnt 'namecalling' btw.
It means that you take things literally without seeing if there is another level of meaning, like 'irony' or 'satire' or 'self deprecation' or 'sarcasm'.
I certainly am not calling you names, nor did I think your post constituted 'criticism'.
I know how our reviews help consumers. They tell a story and provide details and information about each of the clubs we go to.
You asked how the reviews were supposed to help you personally. And since you didnt seem to be able to detect the irony of the writing tone, I honestly cant imagine how they would help you.
Making a fairly funny joke about Jordan was definitely at his expense, and everyone in the immediate vicinity laughed. As did the editor of the clubs section (me). As you stated, by telling the story we were also able to communicate to thousands of readers that even the performers take Florida Law seriously at InCahoots in a pretty funny little story....
I mean, think about it. How better to state: The Club doesnt serve minors?
Personally, I am a great fan of the establishment, I usually go to see the talented Miss Wade --- who was recently so crucial and important to the development of the local GLBT community with her waterchanging essay that we reprinted here on MetroJacksonville--- with the local hipster crowd from TSi and Riverside on Sunday Nights, and everyone repeated what a great time it was.
Jennifer Browning is a college aged young woman without much experience in the urban clubs scene, and I think she honestly expressed what any first time visitor would have thought going to the club. Be honest, its in a scary neighborhood at night: Thats no secret!
The think I like about reviewing clubs in New Media is that the articles are really just a starting point of a conversation.
Its cool to disagree, obviously. But almost everyone ends up finishing or adding different points of view in the forum threads.
So now, even your opinion is part of the official review of the place, including your opinion of Jennifer and myself.
I will be back at the club to see my catty, talented friend karrissa as well as to hang out with Stacy and her wonderful family.
I certainly hope other people check it out and don't think that all of the InCahoots fans are sensitive to te point of being cranky.
whit8583
November 04, 2009, 08:37:30 PMOk so I have two maybe three things that bother me about the “review” of incahoots…
The first major thing would have to be the 18 year old “cohort” that you have working for you. I was there that night and over heard the comment made by karrissa, I guess he’ll think twice before trying to get served under age again. Why the hell would you try and order 3 drinks when only two of you are of age???
All of you r lucky you weren’t thrown out for trying to get a minor served or is that part of your jobs to see if you can get away with it then award and extra bonus point???
Do any of you realize what exactly would have happen if for some reason you had managed to get him a drink? If any kind of law enforcement had witness him getting served or drinking underage not only would all of you had gone to jail but the club would be shut down and the owner and all the staff would have gone to jail as well and not to mention her losing the club and the entire staff losing their jobs… hardly seems worth it for comedic review. It’s a good thing incahoots has a staff that has zero tolerance for underage drinking…
The second thing is the bathroom ordeal…..
I understand it maybe a part of your job to take pictures of the bathrooms but to judge the adverse reactions to it seems a little pompous… if I had walked in to the bathroom anywhere and saw someone taking random photos dam right I would have done the same thing its not some “unwritten code” its just common sense and just plain weird!
I was also outside about to order food (which by the way IS amazing!!!) when I witnessed this so called “aggressive and forbidding” moment. They did not “chase you to the street” you were standing by the doors?? Come on! Really?
p.s. there are 4 bars with 5 bartenders not 3…
stephendare
November 04, 2009, 08:41:17 PMJordan was not trying to order an alcoholic drink.
Karrissa was just making the point crystal clear before the issue came up.
As it happens, Jordan has assisted Karrissa in her performance at Tsi, and no one knows better how young he isl than the ubiquitous Miss Wade.
Sportmotor
November 04, 2009, 08:43:46 PMHmmmm... You've been there MANY times..... & your dissapointed... yet you keep going back?? ... MANY TIMES
But, I'm truly am sorry to hear that you didn't enjoy it. Not every place is for everyone. And, Everyone is entittled to their opinion. Most any given night it's one of the most packed bar's ("slam'd" every Fri & Sat as well) out of all the Bar's in Riverside along with Kickback's (which is also an awesome place).
I am a good friend and like to make sure they get home safely and not drive drunk when they go
I can be just as happy with a few close friends and a bottle of wine or a drink as well has out dancing at a club or talking to random people at a bar
whit8583
November 04, 2009, 10:24:57 PMLook, i was standing there.. Why would you order 3 "house speciality's"? Was there some else with you guys? That was the whole reason Karrissa said what she said? and the fact that this Jordon kid had helped Karrissa at TSI is irrelevant..
stephendare
November 04, 2009, 10:41:09 PMWell there were three other people who were there as well, and your story is kindof irrelevant.
RiversideLoki
November 05, 2009, 08:27:31 AMFunny, I don't see any of the myriad of patrons from Wall Street on here frothing over the low score.
Oh yeah, no one cares.
Lucasjj
November 05, 2009, 08:41:28 AMWall Street rocks! I had not been in there until this past weekend, but that place is good times. Plus I won $25 in a costume contest there.
Does anyone know if they have a website? I could not find one, but the person who gave me my prize took a picture and said it would go up on their website.
RiversideLoki
November 05, 2009, 08:44:03 AMIt should be up on the Facebook page.
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/pages/Jacksonville-FL/The-Wall-Street-Deli-Lounge/150720638455?ref=ts
mtraininjax
November 05, 2009, 09:00:38 AMOh yeah, no one cares.
I really do like the people out here. It makes my day to read and post here. Fantastic!
Bewler
November 05, 2009, 12:26:05 PMOh yeah, no one cares.
Yeah these people defending Incahoot aren’t really doing the place any favors. They’re just giving it a vibe of having an overly sensitive and somewhat hostile clientele.
Captain Zissou
November 05, 2009, 12:51:51 PM^ Just like the folks who defended Moon River did wonders for their reputation...
Take these criticisms in stride folks. If a college girl doesn't like your bar, so be it. Granted, she is a writer for a well read website, but who cares.
playnjville
November 05, 2009, 06:08:59 PMI have to disagree. Sensitive & Somewhat Hostile is by far what INCAHOOTS IS!!
It's prob one of the friendliest NON Cliquish bars in Jax, with an awesome Vibe (also stated in the article)
And you must not have read the actual article...
InCahoots was given the 2ND highest rating out of all (along with the Fabulous Kickbacks).
It's not about being sensitive to the review, The problem that several are having is that:
(1) The slanderous description of the neighborhood, when really all that is around there is Major corporate companies & a security patrolled parking. That could seriously hurt future NEW partons from wanting to come out, over a lie!
(2) The reviewer tried to get the the 18 yr old a cocktail (which could shut the bar down... wow) then called the employee a bitch for busting him.
(3) She handled the bathroom pics situation unprofessionally (to the point that many customers were concerned enogh to get the owner involved) then tried to turn it to the owner being a bitch about it when she was approached about it.
The point about people responding to this isn't necessarily just to defend one of our Favorite places, but to hopefully make the reviewer see how unprofessional & wreckless her writing was.
I've read reviews about other bars that I also strongly disagree with. But those are just opinions...
This review was more than just opinion. It was slanderous lies with an illegal action!
BTW I also think Wall Street got an Incorrect score... I love that place!
stephendare
November 05, 2009, 06:16:13 PMWow playnjville.
'slanderous'?
'unprofessional'?
'wreckless'?
um. Its a nightclub, Not church.
You can't have it both ways btw. Like it makes you look self contradictory to claim that the review slandered the club and then turn around and use the review to prove how fun and awesome the club was.
seriously. Think about it.
Sportmotor
November 05, 2009, 06:23:31 PMopinions are like assholes, everyone has one and they usally Stink
Id ilke to know who this "Our" is you speak of btw and the "we" your speaking like you are representing a group of people. Speak for YOURSELF and let others come on and talk.
@Stephen: He makes you want to go vist that place doesnt he? lol
Bewler
November 05, 2009, 07:06:07 PMAnd you must not have read the actual article...
Can we retire the “you must not have read such and such" card already? It’s had a good run but I think it’s time to stop using it, at least for awhile.
David
November 05, 2009, 07:08:27 PMI didn't read what you just posted, bewler.
Sportmotor
November 05, 2009, 07:11:08 PMNeither did I, I was to entranced looking at his angry beaver
Bewler
November 05, 2009, 07:35:40 PMYou mean Godzilla!
stephendare
November 05, 2009, 07:38:09 PMOf course, there is one thing that does bear noticing.
The neighborhood that InCahoots is in is hardly a rough place. Its right down from the Everbank Plaza, and crawling with security from the club, Blue Cross Blue Shield and the Everbank complex. Its probably as safe as parking in front of the police building downtown.
Sportmotor
November 05, 2009, 08:23:53 PMLooks like an upset beaver
RiversideLoki
November 06, 2009, 09:43:28 AMThe neighborhood that InCahoots is in is hardly a rough place. Its right down from the Everbank Plaza, and crawling with security from the club, Blue Cross Blue Shield and the Everbank complex. Its probably as safe as parking in front of the police building downtown.
Ehh don't be so quick to judge. The bums like to hide in the shadows and mug people. They don't give two craps whether rent-a-cop is around or not. The area is pretty sparse at night and not nearly as safe as you would think.
mtraininjax
November 06, 2009, 09:44:58 AMthe good thing about the area, is that most of Brooklyn was leveled, so there are fewer places for the bad peeps to hang out around there.