That was a very funny post Skot. Flash backs of my wild days in the Colombian Civil War back in the 1980's. I had only been "Married into Colombia" for a short time, till we headed South to meet the family. Good wife always said her family was, shall we say, well placed. When we got there, my eye's were open to a whole new World. Even though we had traveled throughout South America, I was in for CULTURE SHOCK! The shock? We don't have "culture" in the USA! OMG!!
Sadly at that time, Cuban and their drug buddies were still trying to toss out the oldest democracy in the hemisphere. We had to park at the curb in Bogota and got evacuated by the military, telling us to bug out because the Communista's were coming! (They didn't need to beg us) They were launching heavy artillery off the nearby mountains and mounted a bloody attack on the Supreme Court. "Safely" back in Medellin, we entered the lower floor of the high-rise condo. The lower floors are parking and the only windowless entry at street level is into a guarded security cubical. We entered to see the police at the desk were reading the funny pages of the local paper. As the door closed behind us, we heard a car tires squeal on the pavement outside, then the sound of AK-47 gun fire. That distinct AKK AKK sound! Then finally one of the police got up disgusted and tossed his paper down. He leaned out the door, took one look and sat back down with his paper. My wife asked him "Que pasa?"
He just shrugs and says: "Un arepa menos!"
For us Gringos, it translates "One biscuit less" (to worry about...implied)
But that wasn't even the biggest shock, then I came home to JACKSONVILLE after 27 years! Do we even have the biscuit???
Ocklawaha